Ellenora Marie Langkjær

1930 05 03 – 2010 03 03

Min kære mor døde i dag efter en kort ulige kamp mod kræft.
Hun prøvede at snyde kræften ved at afstå fra at spise og drikke.
Kl. 11:30 kæmpede bevidstheden sig fri af morfinens bløde dyne, og hun kikkede på os alle og trak vejret med stort besvær en sidste gang.

My beloved mother died today 11:30.
On the first beautiful day of this year.
She fought an unequal fight against cancer.
She wanted to die in her home with her family around her. And that it how it was.
At 11:30 she let her mind rise from the morphine sleep, looked at us, her children and grand-children.  And took her last breath.

I’m so sad. I’m so sad. I’m so sad.

15 tanker om “Ellenora Marie Langkjær”

    1. Thanks Michaela.
      The family has been united in giving our mother all the support we could theese past weeks.
      I’m glad for your virtual hugs.

  1. I am so sorry for the sadness–but I rejoice that you had such a mother, that the loss is great precisely because the gift was great. My deepest sympathy Carsten.

    1. I’m so greatful for all the sympathy declarations I (we) have received.
      Now I really see the meaning of the word “Deadline”.
      There is no more to say. Nothing I can do.
      There remains questions in my mind: Did I do all I could? Did I let her understand how much she ment to me?

  2. She died on her own terms. Her final kick in cancer’s ass.

    Don’t let those questions grow, Carsten. I had them too last year but they are unanswerable. In time you will find other outlets and answers.

    Now, take the time to grieve. Let others help you and your family. Remember your Mother’s life. Rejoice in it. Share it. Cherish it.

  3. Dear fellow bloggers.

    My mother was buried Saturday. Thanks for your comforting words and advice, both here on my blog, and also written to me privately. Together with the ceremony, you gave me great relief.

    Scott, I really like the way you express way she did it.

    Gerry, I looked at my two wonderful children, and I understand precicely what you mean.

    I expected the ceremony in the church to be the hardest time of all we have been through. But it was just opposite. I felt well and calm sitting there listening to the priest expressing his interpretation of our very good interview two days earlier.

  4. Dear Carsten, I feel deeply sorry for your loss and send you all my sympathy. Mothers never really leave us, they are a part of us forever, there is that special link that bind us together always. As Scott says, take time to grieve, remember all you shared, the little joys and great happiness, tears will be mixed with smiles and you will feel so grateful that you walked on the same path for many years. Sincèrement.

    1. Oh thank you Isabelle.
      Your words instantly made me smile – and my eyes wet.
      Now I’m glad we could help and support her so much in the hard time after the diagnosis. And we are glad that we could help her to die as she wanted without too much pain.
      I’ll probably still cry many tears and smile many smiles.
      I’m writing small notes to support my memory.

  5. We are using 24 hours notation here in Denmark. I just wanted to tell you that she died just before noon. Whith the brightest sunshine through the windows.

    1. Thanks friend.
      We held a wake with coffe, food and beer after church. It gave great relief talking with all the friends who loved my mother. I think I’ll save my grieve and let it come out in small quantity when my brother and I go through our common history. We do have to empty our childhood home.

  6. Carsten…I was here very early in the morning, the day of this post….and I came back twice that same day, planning to say something comforting, but truly, my words escaped me. I chose to pray for your healing instead, because on “paper” I was speechless.
    Forgive me for being incapable of expressing my condolences sooner…if I could have bottled my tears for your sadness and sent them, I would have.
    My wish for you is that healing will come surely and that tears of grief will be replaced by memories of joy. How fortunate we are to have loved and have been loved so completely.

    1. Thank you very much KD.
      Your prayers may very well have helped. I miss my mother deeply, but now I can see that she escaped from the real bad journey by taking a short cut. The funeral gave a lot of peace.
      A tear for your words.

  7. I haven’t read your blog in a bit, Carsten (as indcated by all the comments today). This post stopped me in my tracks. I am so very sorry for the loss of your mom. In time, yoru sadness will be replaced with all the loving memories. She has gone to a place where no pain or cancer exists and each day, smiles brightly down upon you. A mother’s love never dies. It is always with you. Hugs.

    1. Now three weeks after, I feel fine. I miss her. I can not ask anyone about my childhood or my ancestors.
      Your kind words squeezes out yet another tear.
      Thanks Tracey.

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